Long Days, Short Years
A Cultural History of Modern Parenting
184 pp., 5 x 8 in, 1 b&w illus.
- Published: August 9, 2022
- Published: August 9, 2022
How parenting became a verb, from Dr. Spock and June Cleaver to baby whispering and free-range kids.
When did “parenting” become a verb? Why is it so hard to parent, and so rife with the possibility of failure? Sitcom families of the past—the Cleavers, the Bradys, the Conners—didn't seem to lose any sleep over their parenting methods. Today, parents are likely to be up late, doomscrolling on parenting websites. In Long Days, Short Years, Andrew Bomback—physician, writer, and father of three young children—looks at why it can be so much fun to be a parent but, at the same time, so frustrating and difficult to parent. It's not a “how to” book (although Bomback has read plenty of these) but a “how come” book, investigating the emergence of an immersive, all-in approach to raising children that has made parenting a competitive (and often not very enjoyable) sport.
Drawing on parenting books, mommy blogs, and historical accounts of parental duties as well as novels, films, podcasts, television shows, and his own experiences as a parent, Bomback charts the cultural history of parenting as a skill to be mastered, from the laid-back Dr. Spock's 1950s childcare bible—in some years outsold only by the actual Bible—to the more rigid training schedules of Babywise. Along the way, he considers the high costs of commercialized parenting (from the babymoon on), the pressure on mothers to have it all (and do it all), scripted parenting as laid out in How to Talk So Kids Will Listen, parenting during a pandemic, and much more.
Physician and father Andrew Bomback brings remarkable compassion to this meditation on the work of parenting. Long Days, Short Years is an insightful and enjoyable read.
Amy Fusselman, author of The Means
Illuminating while never pedantic, Long Days, Short Years reflects on the pitfalls, lessons, and pleasures of modern parenting. With a keen yet relaxed narrative style, Andrew Bomback explains how being a parent became a culturally supercharged job: punishingly mundane, sometimes sublime, always a moving target.
Christopher Schaberg, Dorothy Harrell Brown Distinguished Professor of English, Loyola University New Orleans, and author of Pedagogy of the Depressed
“Bomback's work on modern parenthood takes on many prevalent topics, including economic anxiety, social pressures, and the tension between careers and family life. His narrative also reveals the internal pressures that parents face to become the best they can be in that role, while recognizing the limits of their resources, patience, and personalities…His empathy and frankness shine through on each page. This book is enjoyable to read and likely to be validating for many parents of young children.”
“[A] charming outing…The author's determination to be a better parent is evident and motivating, and his wide-ranging study makes for a fascinating look at caretaking philosophies. Parents will find this full of insight.”
“There is something refreshing about a 'parenting' author who admits to being imperfect, knows he does not have all the answers, and is not entirely sure what all the questions are. The result is that Long Days, Short Years is plainspoken and straightforward in expression in a thoroughly non-didactic way that readers are sure to appreciate.”